Pretending
by FrankieQuinn13
Summary: "Pretend I'm him." Severus hurts and receives some unconventional help from a very unlikely source. Slash rated M for a reason.


**A/N: if it's not obvious yet**

**I love Severus and that's the reason for this fic.**

**Apologies spelling, grammar and some OOCness**

**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter or any of it's characters, those rights go to J.K Rowling. She just unknowingly let's me borrow some of them from time to time.**

"...wait."

Severus' hands shot up to push back against the shoulders of the wizard above him, clear anxiety and fear painted his features as he tried to think of a way out of this situation.

They were in the room of requirement.

The slytherin lay panting on the red and gold bed, as he stared up at James Potter who's eyes had darkened with lust. There was a warm fire burning in the fireplace on the other side of the room, a large couch sat beside it with a side table that held an empty bottle of firewhiskey. While two glasses lay on the plush carpet infront of the fire. One barely touched while the other lay empty.

Suprisingly enough the empty one belonged to Severus.

Unfortunately, the slytherin's blissful firewhiskey buzz instantly vanished as soon as James started leading him towards the bed.

"It's O.K." The other said with a reasurring smile as he gently took both his hands in his own and moved them so they joined together around his neck.

Warm hazel eyes gazed down at him and the gryffindor lifted a hand to card through raven hair before slipping down his neck and over his chest.

"Just relax." Severus stared back and took a deep breath, unfortunately this action did nothing to ease any of the tension he felt.

Seeing the slytherins urge to turn tail on him and run, James leaned down for a sweet kiss before pulling back and whispering with only a tinge of desperation in his voice.

"You need this Severus. Both of us do." James carefully started unbuttoning Snape's shirt to reveal the thin pale torso underneath. The gryffindor slowly kissed up the boy's chest until he got back up to his lips and Severus saw the same desperation in his eyes as he heard in his voice.

"If it helps... If it helps then you can pretend I'm him."

Severus' eyes snapped up to meet James' and the wizard gave an almost sad smile.

The slytherin tensed when a hand suddenly moved up to force his eyelids shut. "Just close your eyes and pretend I'm him."

Severus let out a shuddering sigh and gave a slow nod before the hand moved away from his face, a pair of warm lips pressed onto his and he tried to think of the person he wanted most.

As a tongue slipped into his mouth and tasted every inch of his mouth he tried to pretend like it wasn't James Potter that was kissing him so passionately and making him moan. He tried to imagine shaggy brown hair tickling his face instead of the unruly raven locks that brushed against his forehead and cheeks.

Tried to think of a different pair of rough hands moving over his skin and stormy grey eyes staring down at him the way he can feel the hazel ones staring at I'm right at that moment.

It was a heartstopping moment when Potter first confronted him almost a month before. He'd caught him in a vacant hall just before charms and pierced the slytherin under his gaze as he spoke.

_'I've seen you watching, I've seen the look in your eyes when he's in the room' _

_'I know what you're thinking when you stare at him like that'_

_'You fancy him don't you?'_

_'I bet you bloody well love him'_

And that's when Snape's heart stopped.

It's not like he wanted to feel the way he did. Merlin knows he wanted nothing more than to forget about _'him'_.

He's tormented him for years afterall, the taunts and teasing were anything from merciless to downright ruthless on most occassions.

Sirius Black hates Severus Snape and all of Hogwarts knew it.

But Severus didn't hate him.

He loved Sirius, he's liked him since the moment they met and he absolutely hated himself for it.

As if his existance wasn't painfull enough; fate (the spiteful harpy that it is) decided to punish him some more by making him fall inlove with the one person that does and always will hate him.

Naturally Severus didn't want Sirius to know of his feelings. Merlin knows what the hateful animagus would do with that kind of information.

Would he humiliate Snape infront of the entire school like he has so many times before?

Taunt and tease Severus and use it to make the slytherin's remaining years an even worse hell than it already is?

Or would he be so overwhelmed by disgust that he'd just skip the tormenting and kill him?

Somewhere in Snapes mind he hoped that Sirius would go for the third option, since he was sure the first two would be worse than any demise than Sirius could ever possibly conjure.

Of course there was the extremely off chance that Sirius might return his feelings but Severus wasn't foolish enough to entertain such delusions for too long.

Naturally when Potter informed him that he knew of Snapes feelings, the slytherin felt like his world was about to end.

He stood there with his back flat against the wall and his eyes wide as he stared up at the gryffindor waiting for the inevitable.

He'd probably humiliate him infront of the whole school like he has so many times.

Or tease and taunt him and use the infromation to make the remainder of his years at Hogwarts even more of a living hell than it already is.

Or probably just kill him for so much as thinking about his best mate that way.

Yet again Severus was hoping for the third option.

However what Potter did next would continue to baffle him for years to come.

The gryffindor's expression somehow softened and stared at Severus long and hard until he eventually stepped back and said.

_'Your secret's safe' _before turning back and simply walking away.

Severus just stood there staring after him for what must have been at least ten minutes when he finally snapped out of it and made it to his next class with an absolutely puzzled look on his face.

Snape doesn't think he's ever felt more confused in his life. He couldn't understand Potters motives for saying something like that and just walking away.

James got even more confusing as the weeks went on.

Talking to him, giving him the oddest looks at completely random times of the day and even trying to console Severus on those days when Sirius decided to be, well...

The arrogant, self-centered, immature, moronic bastard that Sirius Black is. Severus didn't understand any of it and usually made sure to distance himself from the confusing gryffindor seeker as much as he could.

Although, whether Severus wanted to admit it or not. Having Potter around helped a little. The loneliness he's been feeling ever since his and Lily's fight seemed to lessen a little and he'd somehow manage to forget that James used to bully him as much as Sirius does now, if not moreso.

Which is why he agreed to this.

After a particularly brutal prank by the marauders at Snape's expense, James found him in the dungeons and held him against his chest as he offered him a temporary escape from his heartache.

_'I know it hurts'_

Snape gasped but kept his eyes shut as James pulled down his trousers along with his boxers.

_'But I can make it better'_

He felt the wizard push his legs further apart just before he pinned his hips down onto the bed.

_'If you'll let me'_

Severus shivered as a tongue gave his erection a long lick from base to tip, and sucked around the swollen head before taking him in completely.

_'I can make the pain go away'_

Snape tensed as he was engulfed in a warm moist cavern and his hands twisted in the sheets beneath him as he writhed on the bed. Potters head moved down to the tip as he swirled his tongue around the head again before slowly moving back up. Severus' hips bucked up only to be forced back down as James tongue pressed against the vein of his erection and he hummed, sending pleasure waves of vibrations right up to the boy.

It felt good.

Severus could barely hold back the gasps and moans that left his mouth and the slytherin felt like he was slowly being driven insane by Potters agonizing pace.

The slytherin chanced a glance down at the other and found James watching him under hooded eyes.

Severus blushed.

It wasn't right.

James hates him, James loathes him.

Everything about the picture was wrong and Severus wanted nothing more than to run and get away, despite the undeniable pleasure Potter was giving him.

_'If it helps then you can pretend I'm him'_

_'Close your eyes and pretend I'm him'_

Regardless of the fact that he knows that Sirius hates him just as much as James.

At least with Sirius he...

Ebony eyes slid shut and Severus gasped.

The slytherin lifted a hand to bury it in the head of hair over his cock and tried to imagine the strands of hair being longer as his fingers gripped and pressed down on the head urging the other on.

"Ah..." Severus gasped as heat started to coil in his stomach and he knew he was getting close.

Teeth scraped against his erection and he let out a hiss as his hand tightened, until pleasured heat surged through him and Snape came with his eyes blown wide, James sucked him dry swallowing every last drop.

Severus' chest rapidly heaved and his breath left him in pants. The raven had a flush spreading right down to his shoulders, when he looked up and found James staring at him with barely restrained desire.

Before the boy could say a word, James captured his lips in a deep kiss and Severus moaned as he tasted himself on the wizard's tongue and James hands moved down to rest on his hip while the other went down to his opening and he went rigid from shock when a finger pressed against his hole until it forcefully slid in.

Severus tensed and James pulled away to nip his way down Snape's neck as he waited for the raven to adjust to the intrusion.

"Just relax, Sev."

The gryffindor whispered with a voice just drowning with desire, James groaned when the walls around his finger tightened as Severus tensed.

"Just relax."

_'Pretend I'm him'_

Easier said than done.

Sure he's never really touched Sirius, but years of watching the animagus gave him a general idea and James was nothing like how he thought Sirius would be.

Another finger slid into his entrance and Severus hissed in pain as the fingers moved and stretched his orfice.

One finger was little more than uncomfortable, but two that were actually moving...

Severus started to come undone.

The slytherin wrapped his arms around James' neck and tried to focus on the wizard's mouth on his neck and jaw instead of the pain down there.

"Shhh, it's O.K. I'll take care of you." James whispered soothingly as his unoccupied arm wrapped around Snape's waist and he pressed their chest's flush together. "Merlin, you look beautiful like this Sev. Hold on a little longer, I promise I'll make you feel good."

Under any normal circumstances Severus probably would have snapped and told James to keep his cooing to himself and stop treating him like some simpering little virgin girl, but these weren't exactly normal circumstances.

Under normal circumstances Snape wouldn't even be in this situation, now would he?

Severus felt more than just a little out of his element and considering the situation, a little comfort was greatly appreciated.

James was acting so differently than how he usually is. He was confusing and Snape usually tries to distance himself from confusing things, but...

James is the only one who knew, the only one who understood.

And he was helping... in his own stupifyingly odd way. With all the sensations that Potter was making him feel, he hasn't really had time to think about Sirius. He got to forget for a little while, exchange heartache for a different kind of pain.

Severus' back suddenly arched into James' hand as something inside if him was hit and warm static flowed through him. The slytherin gasped as the spot was hit again and he barely registered his hips moving down with his fingers to feel more.

A low whimper escaped Severus' lips when the fingers were gone. He was slightly suprised when his grip on James' neck were pulled off and he was laid down on the bed, before the gryffindor lifted one of his legs and put it over his shoulder.

James gave Severus a deep kiss as he slowly pushed himself in, swallowing the slytherin's scream as he did. Once he'd filled the boy to the hilt James moved to bury his head in Snapes neck as he started to thrust in and out.

Severus mewled in pain at the first few strokes until James hit that spot that made everything turn white and made him gasp for air.

Heat consumed Severus as James' movements sent tremours down his spine and made pleasure to flow through him in short bursts of waves. The slytherin buried his hands in Potters hair, tightening his grip as the pleasure rocked through him.

_'If it helps then pretend I'm him'_

_'Pretend I'm him'_

_'Him'_

Sirius.

He didn't need to.

He didn't have to think about Sirius so he could feel a little better about this. His body was too consumed in the insanely delicious feelings that James was giving him to really care who was giving it.

But what if it wasn't James?

What if it was Sirius?

Would he make Severus feel as good as Potter was making him feel right now? Would the strange mix of pleasure and pain make him moan and scream as much as Potter was now.

What if it was Sirius?

What would he say?

"Ngh," a voice groaned too drowned in desire to be identified, Severus could barely decide if it was a real voice or just a the fantasy in his head. At that moment he'd hope that Sirius would say-

"Merlin, I've wanted you for so...long."

That.

And then he'd start moving faster as he went harder and deeper. Severus would desperately cling to him as his body rocked back and forth, moaning loudly as he came undone while Sirius just moved. He'd pause and move up to stare at him before giving Severus a sweet kiss, one that would seem out of the ordinary especially for Sirius before he started moving again.

Snape would feel his release near and he'd lose himself completely, "Faster..."

Sirius would comply and Severus would cry out everytime his prostate was hit. He'd start begging for Sirius to go-

"HARDER! FASTER, PLEASE-FUCKING SALAZAR-YES! MORE!"

And then his body would slump as he came, with his hands somehow managing to keep their grip on Sirius' hair while he rode out his high. Sirius would still be moving and Severus would feel short bursts of pleasure edge around his haze, the cries would die down to short gasp's until Sirius finally came. The raven's jaw fall open at the sudden sensation of warmth filling him and Sirius would pull him in for a tired kiss before they both slumped into the bed.

"Sirius." Snape breathed and the panting figure ontop of him tensed.

Severus opend his eyes to stare into eyes of hazel brown instead of stormy grey. Sweat slicked raven hair clung to the other wizards forehead, instead of of chocolate brown in a set of dissaray. And an expressionless look was settled on his face instead of an arrogant grin.

Severus instantly flushed and his eyes went wide until James just pulled out of him, making him wince slightly before laying down beside him.

Both wizards stared at the ceiling as their breathing returned to normalcy and heartrates were back under control.

"Do you feel better?" James broke the silence, making Severus resist the urge to look at him as he bit his lip and shrugged.

"We'll need to leave before sunrise." James spoke again and Severus nodded as he quickly scanned the room to try and find his things, when the sheets at the end of the bed were suddenly pulled over him and an arm wrapped around his waist as he was pulled against a hard chest.

"What are-"

"It's not sunrise yet." The gryffindor said as he placed a kiss on Snape's shoulder before setting his head on the pillow beneath it and he felt Severus tense up all over again.

"But-"

"It's O.K. Just pretend I'm him."

**The End.**

**A/N: there it is**

**Please review.**


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